I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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