I just made out with a guy for $7.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I think your dad took our porno
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize