This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Randomize
