i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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