At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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