i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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