they said they heard you say put it in my butt
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
