dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
