i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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