Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
