everyone is single if you try hard enough
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
