he thought i was a dude.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
