I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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