the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize