i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
