so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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