She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Randomize
