That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
