Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Randomize
