Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
