Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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