ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Randomize
