Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Watching her eat just hurts me
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
