Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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