but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize
