i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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