Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Damn victory sex feels great
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
