You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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