Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
