I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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