That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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