Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize