fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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