Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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