I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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