Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
