I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
