Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
