Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize