i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
