I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize