So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
They took my balls.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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