everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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