I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
