Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
