It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
