I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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