my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize