Its about making memories worth repressing
love makes seman taste better
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I am available for nakedness
Randomize
