You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
